Misunderstandings. We all have them at one time or another. We just can’t make it through life without facing hurt feelings, harsh words, and misunderstandings within a relationship. Sometimes we receive it; sometimes we dish it out. When these kinds of things happen, our relationship feels fragile. We may stand there stunned, wondering how in the world we could be in the middle of such a misunderstanding. Or we may feel convicted, knowing it was our fault when our own bad attitudes and words created the situation in which we find ourselves.
And at this point, we have a choice.
We can avoid the situation, hide our hurts, cover up the misunderstanding, and even deny our need to seek forgiveness. Or we can be seekers – seekers of His grace both for ourselves and for pouring out to the other person. We all know the right choice, but it’s the hardest one, isn’t it? How can we move forward and turn those hurts and misunderstandings into a deeper relationship?
We can find some amazing answers in Colossians 3:12. Friends, I have read this verse many times. I have prayed it for the past few weeks since this post. I know others of you have prayed these verses right along with me. But what I didn’t realize is what we were really praying when we claimed and prayed this verse over our relationships!
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Relationships are the stuff that life is made of. They hold us together and keep us going. Some of us have that inner circle of friends that we walk through life with, our encouragers, our confidants, the shoulders we cry on. Others of us feel more alone and sometimes we might find ourselves near the outside of that circle looking in.
I found myself in both of those places over the years, and over time, I realized something important about the latter. In hindsight, I came to understand that in one particular situation I wasn’t really being excluded. Instead, my own broken beliefs and misplaced attitudes were the issues. And I was hiding myself. It was perfectionism at its best.
Today I am so pleased to share an article with you written by my friend Jill McCormick. Jill is a gifted writer and speaker. She breaks inner issues down into portions I can handle and then she points me in the right direction so I can move forward.
This article, which was originally published on her website under the title of “How Perfectionism is Killing Our Relationships” really broke some things down for me. It reminded me of something very important I needed to keep in mind about my relationships.
Jill reminds me that:
•When I struggle in a relationship, the first place I need to look is inside my own heart.•
I’m telling you, friends, that’s not an easy thing to do. I think you’ll find that this article will help you whether you struggle with perfectionism or not. Inside, Jill takes a look at four ways perfectionism impacts our friendships. The great thing is she doesn’t just leave us holding those revelations and wondering what to do. She reminds us what God says about each one, and she gives us strategies the will help us move forward!
Have you ever been afraid to do something you felt you should do? Do you feel called but not qualified? Are you afraid of failure or rejection when you think about that next big step you need to take? I have been in those places so many times I couldn’t even begin to count them.
Sometimes, our next step feels huge, sometimes small. No matter the size, we can’t make it through life with facing a hurdle that needs to be crossed. Often the things we are afraid to do are not only meant to make us braver, but they are intended to help and encourage others along the way. In God’s big picture nothing is really about us at all. It’s all about reaching out and taking the hand of the ones behind us so we can walk together through life’s difficulties.
So today we are going to do a little fear fighting with a blog “extra.” One of my biggest fears has been the fear of writing, especially sharing my writing in public for others to see. This guest post at www.goinswriter.com tells my story of a pivotal step I needed to take to get past this fear of writing.
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Relationships. They fill our hearts full, provide support and camaraderie, and give us all manner of things to help carry us through life’s difficulties. But when there are misunderstandings within our relationships, we may find ourselves feeling at a loss for what to do. I think most of us could say that relationships can be the best and the worst, a stress reliever on many occasions, but sadly, during misunderstandings, they can create much inner turmoil.
As women who love Jesus, we should be compelled to love others like He does, but that doesn’t often come easily and this calls for a lot of prayer. Even the easy relationships should have our payer attention because we have an enemy that wants to tear us apart.
Prayer can heal our relationships and give us direction when we feel at a loss about how to continue. It can help us understand a situation and keep us going when we don’t. Through prayer, God will hold us close when we are hurting, and He’ll not turn us away. Prayer undoes things inside of us so we can move forward in spite of misunderstandings. In prayer, Jesus walks before us, behind us, and right alongside us, all at the same time. God is working in our relationships in ways we can’t see. He is working in especially powerful ways when we pray.
Click below to read more and find 6 powerful verses to pray over your relationships! *FREE PRINTABLES!