Is Perfectionism Affecting Your Relationships?

Join me today as my friend, Jill McCormick takes a look at four ways perfectionism impacts our friendships. The great thing is she doesn't just leave us holding those revelations and wondering what to do. She reminds us what God says about each one, and she gives us strategies the will help us move forward!

Relationships are the stuff that life is made of. They hold us together and keep us going. Some of us have that inner circle of friends that we walk through life with, our encouragers, our confidants, the shoulders we cry on. Others of us feel more alone and sometimes we might find ourselves near the outside of that circle looking in.

I found myself in both of those places over the years, and over time, I realized something important about the latter. In hindsight, I came to understand that in one particular situation I wasn’t really being excluded. Instead, my own broken beliefs and misplaced attitudes were the issues. And I was hiding myself. It was perfectionism at its best.

Today I am so pleased to share an article with you written by my friend Jill McCormick. Jill is a gifted writer and speaker. She breaks inner issues down into portions I can handle and then she points me in the right direction so I can move forward.

This article, which was originally published on her website under the title of “How Perfectionism is Killing Our Relationships” really broke some things down for me. It reminded me of something very important I needed to keep in mind about my relationships.

Jill reminds me that:

•When I struggle in a relationship, the first place I need to look is inside my own heart.•

I’m telling you, friends, that’s not an easy thing to do. I think you’ll find that this article will help you whether you struggle with perfectionism or not. Inside, Jill takes a look at four ways perfectionism impacts our friendships. The great thing is she doesn’t just leave us holding those revelations and wondering what to do. She reminds us what God says about each one, and she gives us strategies the will help us move forward!

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How to Handle Unrealistic Expectations in Your Prayer Life

Do you feel frustrated or disillusioned in your prayer life? These very real experiences can sometimes be traced back to unrealistic expectations. Join us today as we look at three very common prayer life expectations through the lens of some truths from God’s Word.

Great things happen when we pray. It’s our open door to knowing God better and being in a close relationship with Him.

But what about those times when prayer doesn’t seem to be working? Maybe you feel frustrated in your prayer life. You might wonder if God is listening. Maybe you’ve asked yourself if prayer is really worth all the effort. Perhaps you feel disappointed because God does not seem to be answering.

These are very real experiences. I think I could safely say that nearly all of us have these kinds of struggles in some form or fashion in our prayer lives. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, but it is very important to evaluate why you might be feeling these things.

Join us today as we look at three very common prayer life expectations through the lens of some truths from God’s Word.

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How to Handle Unrealistic Expectations – Part 2, Letting Go

Do you have trouble letting go of unrealistic expectations? Read more for some truths from God’s Word that will help you let go and find peace.

“Sometimes we just have to let go of our expectations and let God work!”

I read this text from my friend, Natasha, and I thought, “It’s true, isn’t it?” Our expectations can sometimes get in the way of God’s work.

Do you have trouble letting go of unrealistic expectations? Do you wish you could find more contentment in life? Read more for some truths from God’s Word that will help you let go and find peace.

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A Grace that Defines

Perfectionism can make it hard to receive His grace, and this issue holds us back in ways we often don’t see. Read to find out more.

We’ve been talking about grace for the past few weeks.

• We’ve talked about how God’s grace was available for us before the foundation of the world.
• We’ve talked about how God gives us grace each day in just the right amount for what we need for that particular day.
• And we’ve talked about how grace sets us free.

Today we’ll continue or conversations about grace by looking at an insight that might help us, especially if we struggle with perfectionism.

A huge issue in perfectionism is understanding God’s grace. Our perfectionism can make it hard to receive His grace, and this issue holds us back in ways we often don’t see. Even if we do not struggle with perfectionism, this grace issue is one that many of us face at one time or another in our lives.

There can be many reasons why we find it hard to receive God’s grace, but one particular hindrance to receiving grace is the issue of our own expectations.

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A Grace that Sets You Free

There is a grace that will set you free. It’s a gift waiting for you. Read more here about what the Bible tells us about that freedom. {Free printable bookmark!}

Freedom. It’s a powerful word. It is a gift given through the most costly of circumstances.

When I think of freedom, I think of God’s grace. It’s a deep, deep love, wrapped up in a gift created for each one of us. If we will reach out and take that gift and experience the freedoms wrapped up inside it, we can move forward into a better place.

Here is what grace can do.

Read more by clicking below and find a {FREE PRINTABLE BOOKMARK} too!

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A Grace Just for You

When discouragement strikes, remember God’s grace. It’s a gift created with you in mind. It’s just enough at just the right time. Find out more here!

But to each one of us grace was given according to the measure of Christ’s gift. Ephesians 4:7 (NKJV)

It had been a rough day. I was tired, the house was dirty, and I needed to figure out what to fix for supper. My two little children were still very young and dependent on me, and I felt like I didn’t have what it took to be a good mother to them. I was upset about other things that have since left my memory and the whirlwind of discouraging thoughts I was having felt like more than I could handle.

Have you ever had a day like that? When discouragement strikes, remember God’s grace. It’s a gift created with you in mind. It’s just enough at just the right time. Find out more here!

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A Grace that Sees

Sometimes we feel unseen and the truth of how we feel inside is hidden from others. But there is a grace that sees and a grace that understands. It comes straight from the heart of God. Join me here today as we begin a series of discussions that will take a look at the depth of the love that God has for us.

I see you.

• I see you when you wear a bright smile, but you feel a strain of sadness inside.
• I see you when your life is full of good things, but you feel empty.
• I see you when your activities paint a picture of confidence, but insecurity fills you inside.
• I see you when you feel like you never measure up and when you feel invisible and inadequate.

These things are hidden in the fast pace of your everyday life. Sometimes you can ignore them because you always keep going. You always keep giving. You always keep doing more.

But other times, it wells up and you feel overwhelmed. It leaves you feeling utterly exhausted.

Yet, in the midst of all of that, there are truths that you know.

• You know that God is kind and merciful and full of love.
• You know the Bible contains the truth, and you believe what it says.
• You love Jesus, and you know God as your Father. Most importantly, you know that because of all Jesus has done for you there is forgiveness and new life.

But sometimes it’s hard to feel the security those things should to bring you. To understand this sort of love deep down inside takes something you just haven’t quite been able to grab on to yet.

I see these things because I’ve been there, too. Even in a life surrounded by people that loved and cared for me, a life full of good things and God’s provisions, I still felt all of the things I just described to you.

So I want you to know I see you, and grace does too.

And because of His grace, there are answers for you.

Read more of this post by clicking below!

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How to Strengthen Your Prayer Life Through Grace

Are you putting too much pressure on yourself? Remember GRACE and receive it to bring strength into your prayer life. His strength is made perfect in our weakness!

Grace has always seemed like a gentle thing to me. A soft something that settles down in the heart unnoticed at first, but there, nevertheless. And we feel it’s peace. The thing is, I’m not good at grace. I might be good at giving grace to others, but when it comes to receiving it for myself, that’s a whole different story.

I think we all probably struggle with being harder on ourselves than we are on others, but for some of us, it is magnified, especially if we struggle with perfectionism.

If you struggle with perfectionism one of the things that you may be doing is putting entirely too much pressure on yourself. It’s a vicious cycle because perfectionism tells you that you are never good enough. And that’s the total opposite of what grace says.

Grace would tell you that you are enough, because of Who God is. He created you and He loves you. All of you. Just the way you are.

If you listen to perfectionism and the voice inside your head that says you are not good enough, you are in for a rough journey. It’s a path that leaves no room for receiving God’s grace.

Satan doesn’t mind us traveling this road though, and this is because he wants us discouraged and defeated in all areas of our lives.

He especially wants to defeat us in our prayer lives. Prayer is where the battles are fought and won. And Satan is always the looser. This means that he will do everything he can to discourage us and keep us from praying. Often, these discouragements will come through negative thought processes.

One of these negative thought patterns involves the tendency to be way too hard on ourselves which creates a whole lot of unnecessary pressure in our lives.

Think about the things we say to ourselves sometimes. We would probably never say these things about other people, but we might constantly repeat them to ourselves.

• “I skipped my prayer time today. God will be disappointed in me.”
• “My prayers seem too simple. I’m not really smart enough.”
• “I don’t really understand the Bible. Who am I to be talking to God?”
• “My life is so chaotic. I’m a mess. God wants someone who has it more together.”
• “I’ve done some pretty bad things. There’s no way God can accept me because of the things I’ve done.

This list could go on and on, couldn’t it?

But there is an answer for this. Read to find out more! {FREE PRINTABLE!}

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Build A Better Prayer Life (By Avoiding This Perfectionism Pitfall)

There is Someone who can do a better job building our prayer life than we can. Avoid this perfectionism pitfall in your prayer life! Read to find out more!

For every house is built by someone, but He who built all things is God. (Hebrews 3:4, NKJV)

Prayer is a little like building a house. It takes a plan, a whole lot of time and effort, the right tools and a master builder.

Now if there’s anything a perfectionist likes, it’s a good plan, right? We like the tools, and we are willing to put in the time and effort. As a matter of fact, we are driven in many ways (and not all of them are healthy ways). We want to be efficient, and we focus on that end result, often at the expense of the process it takes to get there. These are all things we need to keep an eye on in our day to day life situations.

But we also have to watch out for these things in our prayer lives, because if we are not careful, we’ll focus so much on the plan that we’ll forget who the builder is.

Join me today as we talk more about prayer and a common perfectionism pitfall.

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